Yeah. I know.
Last week, SLATE columnist, Timothy Noah, called for his readers "to figure out a way to get the health care reform bill across the finish line." Here are two of the winners:
Eighth runner-up: Bruce Miller, Grand Ledge, Mich.:TO READ THE REST, CLICK here.
Invent a time machine. Go back to 1974 and tell Ted Kennedy to take the health reform deal Nixon offered. Inventing the time machine is the hard part, but it is likely easier than getting this bill passed. I mourn for the millions of folks who stood to get help under this bill and am ashamed of our country for kicking them to the curb.
Seventh runner-up: George W. Bush, Crawford, Texas (as imagined by Michael W. Price):
Declare that the U.S. is at war with the forces of Death and Disease. Seek a joint resolution stating the same. Scare up support by telling voters they're all going to die. Have the office of legal counsel draft a memo declaring that the president has the inherent and unfettered authority to protect the nation against the evil "Duo of Demise." Implement the preferred version of health care reform through a secret executive order and pay for it with the 2010 war supplemental. Repeat as needed.
HEALTH REFORM: AN ONLINE GUIDE - (Links to just about everything you need to know about the Health Care Reform bill)